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kioni
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 Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 7:18 pm Post subject: Not Entirely Rotten |
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[Pictures removed]
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Last edited by kioni on Tue Dec 09, 2008 8:47 am; edited 2 times in total |
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kioni
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| Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 7:53 pm Post subject: |
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I want advice from strangers, everyone I know is telling me that I'm too demanding and being irrational:
He is a complete control freak and likes to spend every moment he can with me, this really bothers me--I enjoy a lot of time alone doing what I like (photography, writing, art, etc). It's really annoying, I absolutely can't work when someone else is with me.
It's fine if he likes to get close to me, but sometimes I think he is getting too close...which also annoys me. Physically and emotionally; sometimes, he gets very pushy and angry when I don't share every thing that happens to me, or everything that I think about.
He's constantly asking "what's wrong? Do you want to talk? Why are you so quiet?"
I think we are polar opposites, and I don't know what is making me tolerate him--or even eager to see him.
Sometimes I act a little extroverted, when I think if I don't then he'll leave. I'm really scared of him leaving, he hasn't so far though, ha.
We've been together for two years. He's 7teen.
My questions: Anyone also in an I vs E relationship? Any experiences, advice, revelation etc you can give me?
I'll answer any clarifying questions.
He's the only thing that makes me so...emotional...insecure...uncomfortable..etc...
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ohifwinterends
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| Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 8:37 pm Post subject: |
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My first thought was isfp, but I'm not sure...
I'm thinking maybe infp?
or possibly infj...
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Thrusthamster
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| Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 9:22 pm Post subject: |
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| kioni wrote: |
I'll answer any clarifying questions.
He's the only thing that makes me so...emotional...insecure...uncomfortable..etc... |
Have you talked to him about it?
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kioni
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| Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 9:41 pm Post subject: |
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Yes. He's very intelligent, and that's what can be really...annoying sometimes.
Because he knows everything and acts like he knows nothing.
He can accurately guess practically every one's moves, and uses this to mess with them. He's such a sadistic bastard. (:
I'm slightly masochist, so yea.
Anywayz, every time I talk to him about it...he changes the conversation towards something I enjoy..and he wins at making me feel something isn't important when it really is. 
I've "talked" to him about it, but we haven't really said anything yet.
I'm thinking..he could be ENTP. (I'm sort of still learning about types).
Also: even if we're really angry at each other, we're still "together."
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kioni
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| Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 10:12 pm Post subject: |
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Ninety six views and only two responses who aren't me?
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lordofthefood1
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Joined: 24 Aug 2007
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Location: Ohio
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| Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2008 1:42 am Post subject: |
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He looks ENTP actually.
You're quite the cutie, btw.
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Isra
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| Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2008 2:55 am Post subject: |
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My first reaction for you was INFP... but I think now I'm leaning more toward INFJ.
He is definitely the typical ENxP emotion-manipulator.
I have been in relationships with extraverts before, and it's fun for a while... but the struggles eventually outweigh the upside. It works for some people, but I'm too much of an introvert for that.
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Dean13
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| Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2008 4:04 am Post subject: |
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| kioni wrote: | I want advice from strangers, everyone I know is telling me that I'm too demanding and being irrational:
He is a complete control freak and likes to spend every moment he can with me, this really bothers me--I enjoy a lot of time alone doing what I like (photography, writing, art, etc). It's really annoying, I absolutely can't work when someone else is with me.
It's fine if he likes to get close to me, but sometimes I think he is getting too close...which also annoys me. Physically and emotionally; sometimes, he gets very pushy and angry when I don't share every thing that happens to me, or everything that I think about.
He's constantly asking "what's wrong? Do you want to talk? Why are you so quiet?"
I think we are polar opposites, and I don't know what is making me tolerate him--or even eager to see him.
Sometimes I act a little extroverted, when I think if I don't then he'll leave. I'm really scared of him leaving, he hasn't so far though, ha.
We've been together for two years. He's 7teen.
My questions: Anyone also in an I vs E relationship? Any experiences, advice, revelation etc you can give me?
I'll answer any clarifying questions.
He's the only thing that makes me so...emotional...insecure...uncomfortable..etc... |
Hmm I actually had this problem. The girl I dated was extremely... dumb (I hate being so negative but I don't have another way to put it) and she was reeaallyy clingy. I would force myself to behave like an extrovert just to make her not ask if something was wrong. I realized that if I couldn't act the way I normally do, I shouldn't have to bend myself to act different just because she think it's out of the norm. for someone to NOT want to talk all the time. She ended up thinking I was bipolar and I promptly ended the relationship. I really don't think the problem was that she was extroverted but instead that she was dumb AND extroverted. Not a good combination.
I guess the moral of the story is to be true to yourself, but if you really, really like him you might have to make a few sacrifices. Being myself, I couldn't. So she had to go. |
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ohifwinterends
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Location: Virginia
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| Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2008 6:07 am Post subject: |
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| kioni wrote: |
He's the only thing that makes me so...emotional...insecure...uncomfortable..etc... |
I once was in a relationship with someone who could do this to me also...I swear, that short period of us dating was so intense and I don't think I had ever cried so much in such a short period of time. He knew exactly all of my weak spots and used them to his own advantage. He knew how to make me cry over things I hadn't even though of in years ! Hmm...he was one of those type of guys that got sexually turned on when girls cried because he could "help" them. Whatever. He was 21 and I was only 14 at the time...This should've been a clue for me...He specifically targeted young virgins because he knew he could get then attached (good thing I left before anything happened). I figured out all of this fast and fled because it was just HORRIBLE for me. I'm convinced he has Borderline Personality Disorder.
I hope things aren't like this for you. :/
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kioni
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| Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2008 8:41 am Post subject: |
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In the beginning we had great conversations (not just small talk), he knew how to make me feel great.
Now I feel more and more like an object, and it bothers me that he knows this.
Isra, is two years a "while" for you? I think that I should end this overly long term relationship, but I don't want to make a bad decision.
Dean, I think being intelligent and extroverted is an even worser combination. Because with being dumb, you can be taken advantage of..if you're intelligent then you're the one being the aggressor or in charge. In this relationship, currently, I'm definitley being the one compromising myself for him--which is completely dumb of me. I can be pretty intelligent (sometimes) and he can be competition (I don't know for what  )....I'm really attracted to many different sides of him, and intelligence is one of them.
Ohifwinterends, that's horrible. I hope you didn't lose your virginity to that type of major asshat. (Awkward: I lost it to this guy three months ago). He doesn't make me feel horrible all the time though, ha, this is probably a short period of bleh.
I think that maybe I just need to get a rant out somewhere (since everyone I know thinks I'm being dumb  ). I think this could just be a down period in our relationship.
I really do like him, but I will not be some idiot for him to lash out at when stressed.
I think...I want a little more advice before I do anything.
Ask more questions to help this poor girl out, 
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Dean13
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| Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2008 8:43 am Post subject: |
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| When he lashes out at you, does he get personal? Or is it just the "Leave me alone!" deal? |
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ohifwinterends
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Location: Virginia
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| Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2008 8:51 am Post subject: |
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| kioni wrote: |
Ohifwinterends, that's horrible. I hope you didn't lose your virginity to that type of major asshat. (Awkward: I lost it to this guy three months ago). He doesn't make me feel horrible all the time though, ha, this is probably a short period of bleh.
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Oh no dear, I certainly did not [!]
Hmm...
I mean, overall...are you content with him? is it more good than bad?
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"Even though I'm no more than a monster - don't I, too, have the right to live?"
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kioni
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| Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2008 8:53 am Post subject: |
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The "let me make you feel like crap" deal; which he definitely is good at.
I am slightly masochistic, but it's getting stupid now.
It's because the dumbass has too much responsibilities right now, and of course I'm "always there."
The way he does it is horrible, it just slowly builds up with these small, subtle insults leading to this huge blow. It hurts even more when he ignores me for a while afterwards 
It's even dumber because I get angry at him, but I have no desire to make him feel like crap.
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kioni
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| Posted: Mon Dec 01, 2008 8:54 am Post subject: |
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| ohifwinterends wrote: | | kioni wrote: |
Ohifwinterends, that's horrible. I hope you didn't lose your virginity to that type of major asshat. (Awkward: I lost it to this guy three months ago). He doesn't make me feel horrible all the time though, ha, this is probably a short period of bleh.
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Oh no dear, I certainly did not [!]
Hmm...
I mean, overall...are you content with him? is it more good than bad? |
Definitley more good than bad, overall. Just for the last couple of weeks its been more bad than good.
I can't imagine myself with anyone else.
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