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bourgeois manque
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 Posted: Wed Apr 01, 2009 11:45 am Post subject: Hey P's--a question: |
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Let's say there is an INTP and I want to uplift his attitude on life. I think he feels often, that it is pointless. Now, what gets me feeling better when I'm down is thinking about my plans and goals; even if shit currently sucks, I have something to strive for. Plus it gives my existence some sort of point.
I'm wondering if that sort of thinking does not work as well with P's because planning brings more displeasure than pleasure..? Is there some sort of thinking which gives meaning or pleasure that is more suitable for P's? I'm trying to help but be open to his natural preferences; I don't just want to force J on him. Just kind of wondering about this.
So P's, your thoughts?
And what the hell, if any one else wants to discuss ways they keep happy, or not completely miserable, go for it.
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nonentropic
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| Posted: Wed Apr 01, 2009 12:10 pm Post subject: |
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focus on truth. focus on what makes him different/unique from everyone else. there will only ever be one exactly like each of us...for all time.
make the most of what you've got...be creative...be yourself. if, things aren't working...start trying some new and/or different things...slowly
perhaps.
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The Troll Emperor of Doom
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Purity
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| Posted: Wed Apr 01, 2009 12:49 pm Post subject: |
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| The Troll Emperor of Doom wrote: | Focus does not give meaning no more than a pinnacle makes a mountain. He affirms a fundamentally different platform for his approach to existence, but share the same chemical response biology that allows for his perspective, and your F to dominate your and his perceptions of himself.
Really, at this time the best thing you could possibly do for him is to go down on him. |
I smell Feminist.
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C.Beck
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| Posted: Wed Apr 01, 2009 12:54 pm Post subject: |
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Things turn out for the best for those who make the best out of what turns out. The great irony is that people who've never seen greatness don't believe this.
my personal advice, not as a P, is to tell that cracker to go to the gym.
I think a lot of negativity can be abolished when people make the connection between what they do and how things turn out.
Adjust his locus of control says me.
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bourgeois manque
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| Posted: Wed Apr 01, 2009 12:59 pm Post subject: |
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| C.Beck wrote: | | Adjust his locus of control says me. |
Exactly exactly exactly. Been trying to work on that. 
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bourgeois manque
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| Posted: Wed Apr 01, 2009 1:04 pm Post subject: |
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| The Troll Emperor of Doom wrote: | Focus does not give meaning no more than a pinnacle makes a mountain. He affirms a fundamentally different platform for his approach to existence, but share the same chemical response biology that allows for his perspective, and your F to dominate your and his perceptions of himself.
Really, at this time the best thing you could possibly do for him is to go down on him. |
Sometimes when you say things I have no clue what you're saying.
I'll try the going down on him thing though. Thanks, man.
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C.Beck
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| Posted: Wed Apr 01, 2009 1:15 pm Post subject: |
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| bourgeois manque wrote: | | C.Beck wrote: | | Adjust his locus of control says me. |
Exactly exactly exactly. Been trying to work on that. |
Well what does he like? If there's some way to encourage him to make it more real by competition, rank, performance or display, then you might have a jack pot. Nothing controls reality like people you don't know telling you what they think about you, hahahaha.
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Zephr
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| Posted: Wed Apr 01, 2009 1:36 pm Post subject: |
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I'd say that as far as I can tell thinking things are pointless from time to time is just part of being an INTP. After all, in the end what is the point really?
Anyway, as for advice as to what to do about it, I'd say just get him to do something that is it's own point. Something he enjoys, and preferably something constructive.
If he enjoys working out that would work well, physical activity is generally good for a bad mood anyway.
Remember, he may be completely convinced of the pointlessness of it all, but INTPs are generally easily distracted by things they find interesting, and the pointlessness of it all isn't really very interesting.
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bourgeois manque
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| Posted: Wed Apr 01, 2009 1:43 pm Post subject: |
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| C.Beck wrote: | | bourgeois manque wrote: | | C.Beck wrote: | | Adjust his locus of control says me. |
Exactly exactly exactly. Been trying to work on that. :) |
Well what does he like? If there's some way to encourage him to make it more real by competition, rank, performance or display, then you might have a jack pot. Nothing controls reality like people you don't know telling you what they think about you, hahahaha. |
He likes...gathering information about things. Anything to keep his mind but on the fringe of reality or avoid having to deal with practical matters/responsibilities. Sometimes the things are complex (idealistic political opinions) and sometimes somewhat superficial (oh my god, if I have to hear him tell me more about the features of each of his knives in his collection, I will kill myself). He loves to analyze and pick apart the value of things. Otherwise, he's also somewhat of a hedonist.
He also hates competition because he is both rebellious and defeatist. That's really the main problem--he doesn't believe in himself :(
His enneagram type is a mix between a 9 and a 6--just to imply some information about him.
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bourgeois manque
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| Posted: Wed Apr 01, 2009 1:54 pm Post subject: |
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| Zephr wrote: | I'd say that as far as I can tell thinking things are pointless from time to time is just part of being an INTP. After all, in the end what is the point really?
Anyway, as for advice as to what to do about it, I'd say just get him to do something that is it's own point. Something he enjoys, and preferably something constructive.
If he enjoys working out that would work well, physical activity is generally good for a bad mood anyway.
Remember, he may be completely convinced of the pointlessness of it all, but INTPs are generally easily distracted by things they find interesting, and the pointlessness of it all isn't really very interesting. |
Very true; does sound like him. Though he's not easily interested in things, he wants to find more things interesting; I guess that's why when he finds something that seems to interest him, he's obsessed to find all the information. I think he needs more though... because in his point of view, life seems to give a ratio of maybe 10:2 bad things to good things, which overall makes life seem kind of shitty. Because, I guess he does look at it in the way of what he's doing; he feels like 80 percent of the time he has to do something shitty, or something he feels forced to do as opposed to the 20 percent where he gets to relax and do something he enjoys.
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BatmanHumpsRobin
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| Posted: Wed Apr 01, 2009 5:38 pm Post subject: |
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heh
Last edited by BatmanHumpsRobin on Wed Apr 01, 2009 8:21 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Thrusthamster
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| Posted: Wed Apr 01, 2009 8:03 pm Post subject: |
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Seems like he has a pretty good idea about things.
But yeah, get him to think about ideas and possibilities, and not the planning aspect of it, not in a lot of detail anyway. And get him to work out, so that he will physically feel and see the progress that he is making, which will help. But he probably won't want to do it though if I have the right idea about him.
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Romana
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| Posted: Wed Apr 01, 2009 9:28 pm Post subject: |
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| bourgeois manque wrote: | | He likes...gathering information about things. Anything to keep his mind but on the fringe of reality or avoid having to deal with practical matters/responsibilities. Sometimes the things are complex (idealistic political opinions) and sometimes somewhat superficial (oh my god, if I have to hear him tell me more about the features of each of his knives in his collection, I will kill myself). He loves to analyze and pick apart the value of things. Otherwise, he's also somewhat of a hedonist. |
To me, it seems that information gathering would too easily be able to lead into more defeatist thinking. I would suggest something that is real, tangible, practical. Several people have mentioned working out, which ought to help. Other choices might be crafts/hobbies: does he play an instrument? garden? work on his car? paint? My (INTP) husband relaxes sometimes by painting miniatures, or working in the yard and garden.
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Romana
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The Troll Emperor of Doom
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